March 8, 2007 Issue

When you are of middle age and there is a history of dementia or Alzheimer’s in your family, it is probably natural to wonder about your mental health.

Everyone misplaces car keys, cell phones, remote controls, or forgets where they parked their car from time to time. But what about other signs of a failing memory?

I work in restaurants with over 500 people. I am aware of how important it is to remember co-workers’ names, but many of them come and go and that is a lot of names to put together with faces.

When it comes to young women, if you like to gamble, you can guess that their names will be Ashley, Lauren, Whitney, or Britney. It is phenomenal how often you will guess correctly. With customers, should you be expected to remember the name of someone who dined at the restaurant one time, 10 years ago?

I like to bet on football. I'm sure I've seen every Super Bowl. But could I remember who played in Super Bowl 25? Not a chance.

I like to read. I have read all of Mark Twain's works, Hemingway's novels, and Shakespeare's plays. Don't ask me for too many specific details in any of their writings.

I know people who can remember all of their college courses. I can barely remember where I went to college.

Like others of my generation I have tried a number of drugs, few of which were legal. I once had a physical and the doctor asked what drugs I had taken. "I think pretty much all of them," I replied. "Experimentally?" he asked. "I guess that's one way to put it," I answered.

Can a faulty memory be due to drug and alcohol use as a youngster?

I don't know if Sunday's New York Times crossword puzzle should make me feel as though I'm losing my mind or just that I'm not very smart. In this instance I'm hoping for not very smart.

They now have a test for detecting early onset dementia and they can predict the odds of your developing Alzheimer’s. I don't think it's a very popular test. I know waiting for the results would be a real nail-biter.

Some people can remember every shot played during a round of golf. I've heard that Jack Nicklaus can recall every shot he played in major championships. Let's see; 40 years, four tournaments a year, four rounds per tournament, and an average of 70 strokes per round. That's 44,800 shots. And he's known for his playing prowess? The guy's a savant. I have serious reservations about that claim. I can barely remember where I played my last round of golf.

As a nation we have a pitiful collective memory. Our failure to learn from the lessons of the Vietnam War is a criminal loss of memory. The Washington Post recently exposed the inadequate conditions of Building 18 at the Walter Reed Medical Center. Who amongst us did not know the sorry state of Veteran's Administration hospitals nationwide? Do you think the high-ranking officers of our military go to VA hospitals for their care?

John Prine wrote three decades ago, "Your flag decal won't get you into heaven anymore."
"Support our Troops" bumper stickers don't seem to mean much these days. But, I digress.

I like to think that I can remember some of the important things in my life. I can remember nice things people have said about me or my family. I also remember things said that weren't so nice. I remember successes and I certainly remember personal failures. I have always remembered the many instances of love amongst family and friends. And I remember instances of disappointment regarding the people I hold dear.

On clearspring mornings like today, with a light southeast wind blowing, I remember beautiful days on the Gulf of Mexico between Navarre Beach and the Pensacola Pass, when there were fish everywhere and it couldn't have gotten any better. I can also remember days on the Gulf when conditions were terrible, there were no fish, and I thought it couldn't have gotten any worse.

The memories I have of a half-century of life are almost all good ones. Even the tough times I can now remember with a smile.

You can have my place in line for the test for detection of dementia. I really don't have the patience for the results.

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